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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29968797">don't look down</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/messofunfinishedthoughts/pseuds/messofunfinishedthoughts'>messofunfinishedthoughts</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Acrophobia, Adora (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Anxious Adora (She-Ra), Blood and Injury, Catra (She-Ra) Redemption, F/F, Flashbacks, Fluff, Mentioned Angella (She-Ra), Mentioned Horde Prime (She-Ra), Nightmares, Soft Catra (She-Ra)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 02:54:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,500</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29968797</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/messofunfinishedthoughts/pseuds/messofunfinishedthoughts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>(mention of wounds, cuts, trauma and violence)</p>
<p>before leaving the horde, adora had never been scared of heights. after all, she and catra used to climb up to that spot on the roof almost every day, it was one of the highest points in the fright zone. even after leaving the horde, adora constantly travelled on swift wind, which meant she was high in the sky every day. heights didn't scare her before.</p>
<p>but after everything that has happened in the war, and how many times she has nearly lost catra to cliffs, or high platforms, adora develops a fear of heights (acrophobia). nightmares haunt her, where catra falls to her doom, or they both fall together, or even where she falls alone after catra leaves her in the crystal castle. adora has known nightmares her whole life. but she has never known fear like this.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Adora &amp; Light Hope (She-Ra), Adora &amp; Melog (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Catra &amp; Melog (She-Ra)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>65</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>don't look down</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A gentle wind blows through the windows of Castle Bright Moon, billowing the silk curtains of a certain open-balcony room to the east sector of the castle. The room itself has a simple set up: a stool sits near the balcony, with a crystal hanging above it, as a sparkling waterfall flows down in a slow and relaxing manner, adding to the serene atmosphere of the room. A few feet away from the waterfall, a long purple curtain hangs from the ceiling, its ends meeting the floor. The curtain is parted, revealing a double bed in the centre of it, with crystals hanging down, as well as a small desk and shelf, which is magically floating. Next to the bed is an intricately designed box, with a broken sword inside, its golden hilt and broken runestone being the part that is least shattered.<br/>
<br/>
In the bed lie two girls, one brunette, one blonde. The brunette, a feline girl named Catra, has short brown hair, tan skin, and a noticeable blotchy scar on her upper neck. She wears a grey cropped tank top, with matching tight shorts, and keeps her tail curled around the blonde girl's leg in a gesture of affection. The blonde girl, Adora, is muscular and pale skinned, with messy dark blonde hair, which is spread around her on the pillow. She sports a white sports bra and small, loose fitting grey shorts. At the bottom of the bed lies an alien cat, Melog, the last of its kind from the planet Krytis. It is purring away contentedly, lost in a slumber, much like their owner. Catra sleeps as peacefully as the alien cat, as soft snores leave her mouth, and she subconsciously snuggles more into the pillow. Adora’s sleeping is less comfortable than Catra’s, however, as she is gripping the purple bed sheets, writhing uncomfortably, a frown etched into her features, as she tosses and turns helplessly.<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p><br/>
</p><hr/>
<p><br/>
</p>
<p><em> In Adora's mind, she is looking down a very long, very familiar cliff. Icicles hang off the edge, and a cold breeze blows through the air, whipping Adora's loose blonde hair around her shoulders. Her shoulders roll in a shudder, as the spine tingling frost passes through her body. Adora desperately looks around, trying to fathom how she got here, and that’s when she sees it. Frosta’s castle. Tall, jarring, and completely made of ice. She’s been here before, for Princess Prom, almost three years ago. Then, this could only mean...<br/>
<br/>
Adora knows what she will see before she even looks. Unsteadily, the blonde gazes down the cliff again, gulping, terrified. Where moments ago, there had been nothing but the impending abyss, there was now a familiar face looking back up at Adora, desperation possessing those heterochromatic eyes. There, hanging from the cliff by a gloved hand, is a Catra, with her long unruly brown hair whipping around her. The maroon suit she'd wore at Princess Prom is ripped at the sleeves and lower trousers. She has lost the bow tie that she'd left loosely around her neck. Adora remembers, as they had danced under the warm spotlight, she had wanted to grab that dumb bow tie, and use it as a way to pull Catra forward and kiss her until their lips hurt. But she couldn’t, because of them being on opposite sides of the war. But that was then and this is now.<br/>
<br/>
Catra keeps calling out to Adora, but the blonde’s ears are ringing in a head splitting manner, causing the blonde to grit her teeth in pain. In her state of panic, the blonde cannot hear Catra’s pleas for help. However, the desperate flare in those blue and yellow eyes tells Adora all she needs to know. Catra is in danger, and Adora is the only one around. And what is she doing? Staring down at Catra, as her gloved hand slips further away from the icy crimp she is gripping. Adora holds her hand out to generate the new Sword of Protection, but it does not appear. She slowly gets onto her knees, as the ice makes them numb. The brunette barely smiles, her lips frozen in place, as Adora slowly reaches out a freezing pink hand. <strong>Crack.</strong><br/>
<br/>
The ice below Adora crumbles slightly, and she slips slightly. The image flickers, almost like a hologram, and the Catra left hanging from the cliff is a broken version of who Catra was after the first portal, before Prime captured her and Glimmer. Her head mask is still in place, but is broken, with small pieces hanging off. Three small, bleeding cuts are visible under the mask. Catra’s hair is unkempt once again, her eyes filled with a new kind of despair. Her black shoulder garment is broken on the arm, causing the metal part that shielded her upper arm to dangle off. Beneath the black garment are claw marks, red raw around the edge. Two layers of her skin are easily broken, as blood starts to drip from the wounds.<br/>
<br/>
The image flickers again, in a familiar way to Adora. She had seen this static flicker before, after talking to Mara, her predecessor, down at the Heart of Etheria. Adora gazes down at Catra, who now has green ooze leaking out of the wounds on her arms. It's what Adora always imagined Catra looked like after Glimmer's escape, before her chipping...except ten times worse. Catra's lips are slowly turning blue, and her cheeks are red, coloured from the bitter temperature, but the rest of her face is paling, giving her skin an almost death-like pallor. But more terrifying still, is the way that the brunette’s eyes keep flickering between lime green, and her normal blue and yellow, as vein-like lines (the same sickening shade of green) come up from her neck, and spread slowly across her tan skin.<br/>
<br/>
As Adora grabs Catra’s hand, the cliff finally gives way beneath them, and they go tumbling through the air at rapid speed. Adora goes to grab her hair accessory, a long golden piece with a thick end, like she had done when they had fell off this cliff the first time, all those years ago at Princess Prom. But it’s not there. There is nothing for Adora to use to save them. She tries to summon the Sword of Protection to hand again, but it does not appear. Adora looks down, helplessly, at her own appearance, and notices for the first time how she is wearing her old tank top and shorts, that Catra had accidentally ripped after having one of her nightmares. The thought of Catra, <strong>her</strong> Catra, so strong yet so vulnerable, so brave yet so prone to moments of weakness, brings tears to Adora's eyes. This couldn't be real. She couldn't lose Catra.<br/>
<br/>
Gravity increases on the two women, and Adora can only watch as Catra's appearance changes once more. The right side of her face, upper right torso, and her right arm are all a very deep black, with purple cracks surrounding those parts as well. Adora remembers when this had happened the first time, after Catra had returned from the original portal's void. As Catra becomes more corrupted, she loses her grip on Adora’s hand, plummets towards the ground, the image of her becoming smaller and smaller until Adora can no longer see her. Adora cries out as she watches the love of her life fall to her doom.<br/>
<br/>
</em><br/>
</p><hr/>
<p><br/>
</p>
<p>Adora sits up, panting, crying, alerting Melog, whose body language mirrors how Catra used to sleep on Adora’s bed, back in the Horde. The creature immediately starts mewling, and shuffles up the bed, attempting to wake Catra up, but Adora gently pets their mane, shaking her head. The blonde girl pets the alien cat for a few minutes, to calm both herself and Melog down. When Adora looks down at Catra, and sees that she is still here, it is enough to regulate Adora’s breathing, but not enough to calm her down completely. Somewhere deep down, she’s scared that this is another torture that Prime has maliciously conjured in order to afflict her.<br/>
<br/>
Adora pets Melog's mane affectionately, before slowly sneaking out of bed, picking up a blanket from the floor to wrap around her. She runs her hands through her hair, and walks over to the waterfall besides the balcony. Adora shakily puts her hands in the water, before running it over her warm face, sighing as the cold liquid cools her burning skin. The blonde lets out a shaky sigh, and stares blankly into the water, just as she had done in Prime's first illusion, where she had envisaged the future she so desperately yearned for with Catra. Adora soon notices how her pyjamas are sticking to her uncomfortably, a sign of how distressed she had become. She grimaces, and walks over to a set of drawers near the door, pulling out a fresh set of pyjamas, as well as a silk dressing gown that had been a gift crafted specifically for her, from some of her admirers in Mystacor. Looking back over at the bed, Adora notices Catra sleeping contently, purring softly. The blonde smiles at her girlfriend's antics before silently slipping out of her sports bra and shorts and into the waterfall pool. The cold temperature of the water cools Adora's burning skin, and she sighs as she sinks deeper into the pool, resting her head on the marble edge of the pool.<br/>
<br/>
Adora had never been scared of many things. She'd been raised as a soldier, someone to be both feared and admired. Then after learning she'd been raised to destroy this planet, rather than free it, she'd become a hero, a saviour to Etheria. Stars knew Adora went through enough in the first six months in the Rebellion, just trying to prove herself to those around her. Shadow Weaver's infiltration of Mystacor, and Catra's betrayal in the Crystal Castle had been particularly painful. Adora's spine tingles at the latter memory. The picture of Catra standing above her with the Sword of Protection in hand and that crazed look in her eyes; the chasm below her, so dark and unknowing; Catra throwing the sword down into the chasm, leaving Adora to her fate; letting herself fall into that chasm...That was when Adora had first felt a fear of heights instilling itself in her.<br/>
<br/>
The Battle of Bright Moon was the next event that made Adora realise that she too was prone to fear, just like every other Etherian. Seeing Catra behave in that cold, ruthless manner, presenting herself as the soldier that the Horde had moulded her into, it was hard for Adora. The blonde couldn’t accept back then that maybe the best friend she’d known growing up wasn’t the same person as who that girl had become. Cutthroat. Ruthless. A force to be feared. Maybe there was no going back for Catra. But as Adora would learn a year later, Catra was a worse force than even Adora could have predicted. It’s truly crazy what power can do. If Shadow Weaver had ever been right about anything, it was that power changes people. It had changed Adora for the better...but it had changed Catra for the worse.<br/>
<br/>
When the first portal had been activated, Adora had decided that she, Catra and heights weren't a good mix. The portal had been the hardest challenge yet, and it had nearly obliterated the Rebellion, and Etheria, altogether. Adora had had to stand by and witness reality collapse in on itself as everyone she loved disappeared, including her Queen, the person who she'd began to see in a motherly light. Angella's sacrifice that day had scarred Adora, not physically, but mentally. And true, she had known the feeling of fear before that event, but nothing compared to the fear she had felt after the portal. Nightmares plagued her in the run up to Glimmer’s coronation. Every time she closed her eyes, she heard the beat of Angella’s wings taking flight up into the portal. She heard the words <em>”Now, I choose to be brave”</em> on repeat. It had kept her up at night, hit her like a truck during the day, tortured her when she least expected it. Because she was supposed to be the hero. That was the worst fear Adora had known.<br/>
<br/>
The first year of Glimmer's reign as Queen had been disastrous, from Shadow Weaver's skilful manipulation, Double Trouble's revelations and especially the Heart of Etheria. Adora had promised Angella she would take care of Glimmer, but she felt like she had failed. She hated that feeling of failure. Because that was the thing she feared most in the world. Not Catra, not even the impending threat of the larger Horde army that was on their way. She had a mission, and that was to stop Light Hope from activating the Heart. But Glimmer had been blinded by the promise of the end of the war, and ultimately, the planet had been 'balanced.' Adora had rushed to the Crystal Castle to stop Light Hope, but seeing the drop from the platform Light Hope had been on, Adora had felt nothing but nausea. She'd fulfilled her mission, stopping the Heart from fully activating, but now her stomach could only churn in unstoppable nausea.<br/>
<br/>
As Adora had stood on the sands of a desert that she couldn't remember walking to, she gazed up at the stars and finally allowed herself to relieve her nausea. She didn't know how long she spent retching, but she did know that she had managed to collect herself before Bow found her, and told her how Glimmer had been captured. Now that her nausea was rid of, all Adora could feel now was numbness. She'd failed Angella. She'd broken her final promise to the previous Queen of Bright Moon, she'd not fulfilled that final request. That final request which Adora had swore she would fulfil even if it meant it was the last thing she'd do. That final request, to take care of Glimmer and the others, which had been one of the most notable features of Adora's recent nightmares.<br/>
<br/>
After Glimmer's capture, the Rebellion had had to abandon Bright Moon, leaving King Micah not only without his daughter, but without the safety of his kingdom too. Adora had no idea what to do to help him, and as a result, she had been tortured by more emotional and terrifying nightmares as the days wound on. If she wasn't visited by the ghost of She-Ra, it was always the ghost of Angella telling her she had failed. Adora was restless at night, exhausted during the day. She couldn't eat, or properly plan any form of attack, choosing to just barge into battle and hope for the best instead. The whole Rebellion recognised that Adora wasn't herself since she lost She-Ra, but they weren't sure what they could do. Adora wasn't one to be easily influenced, it took a lot to get through to her. Bow called it stubbornness.<br/>
<br/>
Adora refused to fly on Swift Wind after what had happened at the Crystal Castle. She never wanted to be up high, on any kind of platform again. Nightmares tortured her of shattering the sword, losing She-Ra, losing the hero she was born to be. Because, at this point, Adora had spent so long having She-Ra as a part of her, she couldn't see any other form of destiny for herself. She was supposed to be the hero at the forefront of the Rebellion, leading them to victory. But instead, she was now rendered useless, only as good as the training that the Horde had given her. Whilst she was a strong soldier, she was stronger, more powerful, as She-Ra.<br/>
<br/>
Soon after finding a new base for the Rebellion, Adora had inevitably collapsed from stress and exhaustion. She remembers, looking back, how every bone, every muscle, every <em>inch</em> of her body had ached, in such a way that she had never before comprehended. Bow had chided her, saying it was just exhaustion, that she had inflicted on herself due to her constant recklessness by barging into battle, and her restless nights. Adora had hated it. She'd termed it as her body 'betraying' her. Bow had simply insisted that she slept, so she did. And yet again, She-Ra visited her, and led her to the portal she had come to Etheria in. Adora had realised, for the first time, that she was still a leader of the Rebellion, with or without She-Ra's power. She had thanked the ancient hero for everything she had done for her, the memories she had given her, the friends she had brought here...everything.<br/>
<br/>
After Adora awoke, it transpired that Bow and Entrapta had finally found Glimmer, tracked down Prime's flagship. It was progress, that Adora was so grateful for. She had her mission now, a real goal that wasn't so impossible anymore. It gave her a sense of purpose, something she had consistently sought out for the past three years. Micah and the princesses had made way for Bow, Adora and Entrapta to leave Etheria without any trouble, but they had been detected. Prime knew they were coming. But Adora was sure that she and her friends could save Glimmer. But then, the mission took an unexpected turn.<br/>
<br/>
As they travelled through space, the crew began to realise that Mara's ship was still not in perfect condition, which caused them some delays. But with some hard work from all of them, Mara's ship, promptly named Darla by Entrapta, had finally got enough signal to receive a transmission, whether it was from Etheria, or from somewhere in outer space. It was extraordinary really. turned out that the Queen wasn't the only one who had been captured.<br/>
Adora was shocked when the first transmission that came through was Catra, instructing Adora to travel to a certain set of coordinates to rescue Glimmer. There was no time for questions or answers, only immediate action. The aftermath of Catra's transmission had been rough for Adora. Glimmer had revealed that Catra had saved Glimmer only for the sake of Adora. That had sent Adora onto another emotional torrent. Truth be told, she had been wondering where Catra had disappeared to after Prime had arrived, since the war criminal had not been spotted anywhere on Etheria (and Adora had checked, thoroughly.) Hearing Catra again, seeing the good in her...it was like a dream. Only it had come at such a difficult time.<br/>
<br/>
Glimmer was transported to the quadrant that Darla was currently flying through, and Bow had been deployed to rescue her and get her back on the ship safely. Adora no longer cared about the friction between them when they were back on Etheria, despite the awkward air that still hung in the atmosphere. If her nightmares had taught her anything, it was that taking care of Glimmer was something she now had the chance to fulfil once more, and this time, she wouldn't mess up. If she had taught <em>herself</em> anything, it was that everybody made mistakes, and truthfully, Glimmer probably had good reason to. Adora and Bow knew, from Glimmer's meltdown on her coronation day, that Glimmer wanted people to remember Angella, mourn her or celebrate her, it didn't matter as long as she was remembered. Glimmer had tried to be the same Queen that Angella had been, but it had failed. The mother and daughter were different after all. So Glimmer became her own Queen, but ultimately, she was led astray by Shadow Weaver, and became eaten up by power. The difference was, Glimmer realised when she had messed up. Shadow Weaver hadn't. Glimmer was capable, <em>deserving</em> of redemption. So Adora gave it to her without a second thought.<br/>
<br/>
When Adora and her friends had gone on a search for the thulite crystals that would power up Darla, her confusion to the recent event with Catra had only been amplified, and turned to a frosty fear when Jewelstar, one of the three Star Siblings she had met in the crystal caves, had told her that no one stands up to Prime and survives. Obviously Adora had been thinking this already, but she had also tried to convince herself that Catra always found a way out. But Prime was unlike anything she, or Etheria for that matter, had ever seen. He was a worse threat than the First Ones, and perhaps even the Heart of Etheria. He needed to be stopped, but first, Adora needed to save Catra.<br/>
<br/>
The thought was on her mind for the whole mission, her mind and heart racing at the memory of Catra's panicked voice coming through the transmission. But of course, as with everything else, she got side tracked. When Adora and her friends had finally found the crystals they needed, earthquakes were disrupting the tunnels, causing a cavern to appear. It dropped down for miles, making Adora sick to the stomach. Worse still, Glimmer, who had only just been returned to them after three months, was caught in the mayhem. Whilst Adora, Bow, Entrapta and the Star Siblings remained on the side of the cavern that was near the exit, Glimmer was caught on a thin ridge of the cavern near the crystals, and was determined to get them. Seeing Glimmer up that high, with no form of magic or teleportation to help her, it revived the deep rooted fear in Adora.<br/>
<br/>
The most significant thing that had happened was that She-Ra had made an indirect return when Adora needed her, after she swore that she would not leave her friends behind. She wasn't going to leave that cavern until Glimmer and Bow were with her, and so help her, she would die in this cavern if they couldn't make it out either. Her stomach had dropped when the crystal they used to secure Bow's rope around, and they had fell down the cliff. Nausea rose in her throat, and though she would never confess it, she had been sick when she was back on the ship, and recalling the events.<br/>
<br/>
Rescuing Catra was when Adora's acrophobia became painfully, dreadfully real. Before, it had felt like something she could ignore, but now, she would never forget it. She would never forget the echo of her own footsteps as she walked along the platform to Prime's throne. She'd swore, after everything that had happened at the Crystal Castle with the activation of the Heart of Etheria, that she would never go near a platform like this again. But she couldn't see the future, she couldn't predict this. Every step felt like a movement towards her doom, and she had no idea at the time that she potentially was.<br/>
<br/>
Adora had a plan, one that she and her friends had calculated precisely. But it had all relied on Catra being imprisoned in the cell Glimmer had stayed in. That was a big miscalculation. Of course Prime would not show that leniency to Catra, not after she betrayed him. He had gone to the extremes, just to prove his point that nobody should cross him. He had chipped her, made her one of his clones. Adora had almost thrown up on site when she'd seen what Prime had done to the feline girl. Her long hair was gone, now short, gelled back neatly. It was sickening. There was nothing neat about Catra, she had always been chaotic. But Adora liked that about the brunette girl. What Prime had done to her, it was so much worse than just corrupting her mind. He had completely rewritten her identity. Adora swore she would kill him.<br/>
<br/>
Prime knew that he had riled Adora, but since she had refused to give him She-Ra (because how could she when the Sword was shattered and back home on Etheria?), he left her in Catra's hands instead. A battle had ensued, and was easily the most vicious that Catra and Adora had ever engaged in with each other. Without She-Ra, Adora was completely vulnerable to injury, and Catra, or rather Prime, had taken complete advantage of this, pushing Adora further towards defeat. Looking back now, Adora remembers the lump in her throat as she and Catra fought, the pure emotion that had gathered in her throat, completely overpowering and distracting her.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Now, as she lies in the soothing waterfall pool, Adora lifts her arm up, and runs it down the three scars that are placed just below her shoulder. Catra had inflicted them when she was chipped. She-Ra had always been able to rid herself of scars left by Catra in battles, but Adora did not possess this ability, so the scars remained, even after She-Ra's return. Adora didn't mind them, to be honest. They reminded her of Catra, obviously, but they also reminded her of what she and Catra had had to go through in order to find their way back to each other. The rest of the Princess Alliance now referred to Catra and Adora as 'The Great Love Story', which was both ironic and fitting at the same time.<br/>
<br/>
Adora lifts her left leg out of the water, watching as droplets of the clear water run down it. Three scars, much like the ones on her back, sit just above her knee. They were also inflicted by Catra, back when she was chipped. Adora didn't really think about these scars often, only when she bathed or showered. The scars on her back were more noticeable, due to her sport attire pyjamas, and new loose clothing that both Glimmer and Catra had <em>insisted</em> she wear after the war was over. If the vision of the future that Adora had envisaged was anything to go by, she would end up wearing a flowing white dress with golden accents to Scorpia's first ball, which would reveal her scarred back to everyone who saw her. The scars were forever, but so were the memories. However much comfort Adora found in the fact that the scars were inflicted when Catra wasn't really herself, she was also sometimes reminded that Catra had still committed many a crime, and that thought usually worsened her nightmares.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Perhaps one of the most painful memories of the experience on Prime's ship was when Adora had managed to fight back against Catra, and ended up pushing her towards the ledge. Nausea spread through Adora like wildfire, as she held out a hand, stumbling forward. Prime had been amused by this, even willing to let Catra fall, until Adora pulled her back. That's when Catra had scratched into the blonde's back. Her voice had mixed with Prime's, and it was all Adora could do to resist throwing up the bile that rose in her throat. His voice still haunted her, even now.<br/>
<br/>
Catra had grabbed Adora, holding her over the edge, preparing the drop her. Prime had bragged how Catra had been afraid in the end, and how she had suffered. Adora knew now that Prime had only told half the story. Catra wasn't afraid, she was terrified. After the clones had brought her to Prime, he had informed her that Adora's ship had changed course,  but her plan wouldn't stop him. He had felt for himself how scared Catra was, and he could even tell by the desperation in her mismatched eyes that deep down, she wanted Adora to come back for her. Adora had played right into his hands. Catra was <em>dragged</em> to the chipping pool, as she kicked and screamed at Prime and his clones that she would never be one of them. She had tried attacking Prime himself- a big mistake. Clones had tightened their grip on her, and she had been thrown into the green pool.<br/>
<br/>
Adora had covered her mouth in distress when Catra had recalled this tale, a few days before they went to Krytis. Catra had continued, talking about how she had sank beneath the water, and out of nowhere, it felt like someone had stabbed into her neck, and her entire nervous system had pulsated as the chip connected to her body. She doesn't really recall much after that. She remembers the clones fitting her with their white Horde uniform, as others cut away at her hair. Why did Prime even have scissors on his ship anyway? Catra felt empty without her long thick hair, like a part of her identity had been stripped away, which it had. But Catra didn't want to see it like that. She still wanted to be that same strong, driven, determined soldier the Horde had raised her to be. But how could she be any of those things if Prime was stripping her identity away? Adora had to remind Catra that she was still the same person, and that the trauma she had endured had only made her stronger. After all, she had survived...just barely.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
After Adora had pushed Catra back, right into that annoyingly large screen near Prime's throne, the chip had began to crackle, and Adora had finally put the pieces together. If she broke the chip, she would get Catra back, and Prime's hold on the brunette girl would be gone. So Adora changed her tactic, and momentarily succeeded in her goal. Just when she had finally reached Catra, the <em>real</em> Catra, Prime had interfered once more, and this time, he succeeded in sending Catra falling off the platform. Adora's heart had rose to her throat, her heart hammering against her chest. It couldn't end like this.<br/>
<br/>
The blonde girl had ran to the edge of the platform, her own life flashing before her eyes as she watched Catra's figure slip further into the darkness below. Adora's skin had gone cold, and with a sob caught in her throat, she had jumped down the chasm, taking all of her pent up fear with her. She fell for a few moments, and with a lurch of her heart, she landed roughly on the ground, blacking out for a few moments.<br/>
<br/>
When Adora had opened her eyes, she had subsequently been blinded by the light of the throne room above. Looking around, she located Catra's almost lifeless body, and gasped, terrified. The blonde tries to stand, but her legs buckle, and fall beneath her. Looking back, jumping down a chasm with no idea of how deep it is was probably not the best course of action. Adora had cradled Catra's body, as the brunette woman let out a hitched breath. Adora finally lets herself cry, heartbroken. She's failed. <em>Again.</em> In that moment, Adora had realised how much she truly loved Catra.<br/>
<br/>
Adora had always harboured feelings for Catra, but she had not been able to recognise or categorise them as romantic until after joining the Rebellion. When she had found out about King Micah and Queen Angella's marriage, she had not really seen it as romantic, but more a diplomatic arrangement that both parties had eventually been okay with. Adora had of course heard the word 'love' before. After all, her name derived from the word 'adored', which connotated with loved. She had only heard the word 'love' a few times in her life, and had only began to understand it after she met Glimmer and Bow. But as far as she could tell, up until after the Battle of Bright Moon, it was simply a term to refer to close friends or relatives.<br/>
<br/>
It had been Queen Angella who had educated Adora on what the word 'love' actually meant. She had found Adora one night, thinking about Catra, and how far they had already drifted in the eight-nine months since Adora had left the Horde. Honestly, it hadn't felt that long, but between fitting in at Bright Moon, and recruiting the princesses for the new Alliance, time had sped by. When Adora had shared her thoughts with the Queen, who she was beginning to bond with, Angella had explained the notion of love, specifically romantic love, and asked Adora if perhaps any of what she had said made Adora think of Catra.<br/>
<br/>
Truth be told, a lot of it had. Having feelings of deep affection for someone, wanting to see them and be with them often, something that gives you pleasure, and makes you feel warm and content inside. The Horde was chaotic, it always had been, and Catra, despite being energetically chaotic herself, was a distraction from the chaos. Adora actively enjoyed spending time with Catra, more so than anyone else. She'd always known her relationship with Catra was different to that of her relationship with everyone else, but she just reasoned that it was only because they were best friends. How wrong was she.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
When She-Ra had returned, she had returned in full glory and blazing anger. Adora hadn't even realised She-Ra had possessed her until the magic had transformed her. She had realised then that She-Ra was not just a being of magic, she was a being forged of love. Back in the crystal caves, She-Ra had made an incomplete comeback, when Adora had been determined not to leave her friends behind. And now, She-Ra was back, in full form, because Adora had lost the one thing, the one <em>person</em> she loved most in the entire universe. Adora had never been more grateful for She-Ra.<br/>
<br/>
Adora didn't even want to start thinking about what had happened on Krytis, or at the Heart of Etheria. Sure, the events at the Heart had led to her and Catra finally being honest with each other about how they felt, but before that, they'd both nearly died. Heck, Shadow Weaver <em>had</em> died. It had been traumatic. If nightmares about heights weren't torturing Adora, then nightmares about the Heart certainly were. Adora often wondered if she would ever stop having nightmares. If she <em>and</em> Catra would stop having nightmares. She could only hope.<br/>
<br/>
"Adora?" A voice whispers in the dark. Adora gasps, and sits bolt upright in the pool.<br/>
"Hey, it's just me." Catra says, holding her hands out.<br/>
“Catra.” Adora sighs in relief. The feline woman sits on the stool at the side of the pool. Adora knew she would not get in. After what Prime had put her through, Adora wasn’t surprised. Catra stares gently at Adora, as if she knows what is happening in Adora’s head right now. To be fair, she probably does.<br/>
<br/>
Catra and Adora have had their fair share of nightmares between them, ever since they were children, back when neither of them knew the atrocities of the Horde. Or at least, they knew no atrocities beyond Shadow Weaver’s abusive and neglecting behaviour. The nightmares only got worse after they were separated. For the most part, Adora could keep hers at bay, but Catra was always tortured by one thing or the other. After what happened with the portal Catra opened, she had been haunted by nightmares of the contraption, by the memory of Adora, even. It would seem that the blind girl acted as Catra’s subconscious guilt.<br/>
<br/>
But the worst nightmares to come came after the events on Prime’s ship. Adora would never forget how Catra’s eyes would fill with uncontrollable fear after getting flashes from her chip. She would never forget how, after the war, Catra would thrash around and scream in her sleep, as she was tortured by nightmares of what had happened in the war, of what could have happened at the Heart of Etheria, had it not been for her own declaration of love. Some nights, she even begged Adora to put her in Bright Moon’s prison (completely unaware that the only prison Bright Moon had was the plush room in the South Wing) and have her tried and punished for her crimes. But on nights like these, where it is Adora who has had the nightmares, the couple usually sit in silence, as Catra comforts her lover.<br/>
<br/>
“Was it the heights again?” Catra asks quietly, massaging Adora’s shoulders gently, as Melog comes and sits at her feet.<br/>
“Y-Yeah.” Adora stammers, moving into Catra’s soft touch.<br/>
“It’s gonna be okay.” Catra affirms, pressing a kiss into the side of Adora’s face.<br/>
“I just...what if we never escape them? The nightmares? What if Prime never really leaves?” Adora starts to panic, her breathing hitching once more.<br/>
“Adora. Listen to me. He’s gone. He’s not coming back. We’re safe.” Catra reassures, now planting several kisses into Adora’s messy hair.<br/>
<br/>
This was routine for the young couple by now. Almost every night, one of them suffered from nightmares, haunted by the past, by the war, by their childhood. Anything that affected them negatively morphed into a horrific nightmare that trapped them in their mind, and made them uncontrollably terrified. Usually, when Adora has nightmares, they don’t talk about it. Adora doesn’t like talking about it, it makes her feel like a burden. But Catra never saw it that way. She wanted to tell the blonde girl that her feelings mattered too, and she could stop putting up this strong front now. But Adora was stubborn, and it would take a long time for her to realise that her trauma, her emotions, her fears, all of it was valid.<br/>
<br/>
“I just don’t want this anymore.” Adora whispers, pulling herself up from the pool, and wrapping her silk dressing gown around her. Catra gently combs her fingers through Adora’s wet blinded hair.<br/>
“Don’t want what? The nightmares?” Catra asks, in the same hushed tone.<br/>
“Yeah.” Adora nods. It makes sense, Catra reasons. The nightmares affected them both in different ways emotionally, but physically, they were both drained by them.<br/>
<br/>
“As much as I don’t want to say it, those nightmares are a part of us, Adora. They take our experiences and our fears and mould them into more terrifying events, which we don’t even think are possible until our nightmares act them out. But listen to me, you are safe here. Ive got you, and I am <em>not</em> going to let go. Not today or tomorrow, or next week or next year. So please, trust me when I tell you that those nightmares aren’t real. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” Catra reassures, as tears gather in Adora’s eyes.<br/>
<br/>
“You promise?” Adora asks shakily. Catra smiles, and bends down to kiss her girlfriend on the lips.<br/>
“I promise. We can even talk to Perfuma if you want. You know 5% of the world if affected by acrophobia? It doesn’t seem like a lot, but it is. Your fear is more common than you think, Adora. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”<br/>
“I just- I’m just so scared...when you fall, or-or I fall-“ Adora starts to cry again.<br/>
<br/>
It breaks Catra’s heart to see Adora like this. So broken, so scared, all of the things no one would expect the hero and saviour of Etheria to be. And that was just it. Adora spent so much of her time putting up a brave facade for other people that she lost herself to it, and became self-critical when she demonstrated any sign of weakness. It was something that had formed in the Horde, where weakness had been something nobody ever dared show, and developed in the Rebellion, as Adora tried to be the hero that the scriptures and tales detailed She-Ra as. But now, the bluebell-eyed girl was her own She-Ra, with no restraints, no higher authority, no one to tell her how to act or who to be. Yet Catra noticed that Adora craved that sense of direction.<br/>
<br/>
“You’ll always wake up. And when you do wake up, I’ll be beside you, ready to comfort you. I love you, Adora. Please, don’t let yourself become somebody else because of the nightmares. They’ll win that way.” Catra explains.<br/>
“How do I stop the fear though?” Adora asks weakly.<br/>
“Don’t look down. Don’t be scared of falling from the heights. Fall for me instead.” Catra smiles. Her words were cheesy and stupid, but she supposed that was bound to happen now that she’d spent so much time with these stupid princesses. She’d become prone to their stupid affection, and as a result it had rubbed off on her. But now that Adora was looking at her with a smile on her face, it just might have been worth it.<br/>
<br/>
“I already have fell for you.” Adora grins, standing, regaining some confidence. “Hook, line and sinker.”<br/>
“Good,” Catra smirks, wrapping her arms loosely around Adora’s neck, swaying on her two feet. “Because I’m never letting you go.”<br/>
“That’s good then. Makes my plans for the future easier to fulfil.” Adora smiles. Catra’s cheeks heat up, but thankfully, Adora doesn’t notice. It’s only been five months since the war ended, but Catra is determined that when the dust settles, she will spend the rest of her life with Adora. She’ll propose to her, using the old runestone from the broken Sword of Protection. They’ll get married, like Spinnerella and Netossa, they’ll have a child, they’ll be happy. Finally. All Adora had to do was let herself fall freely into the future the both of them so fully deserved.<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p><br/>
</p><hr/>
<p><br/>
</p>
<p>The next seven months are tricky. After finding Adora awake that night, Catra had sworn she would get Adora the help she needed in order to overcome her terrorising nightmares. It took Adora a while to adapt to the idea of therapy, mainly because she was more of a do-it-yourself person, who felt that asking others for help was more of a burden than anything. This was one of the first things Perfuma decided to focus on with Adora. The flower princess reminded Adora that sometimes it was okay to ask for help from others, and it was okay to have emotional wobbles. Such things made her human after all. The therapy had started in hopes of tackling Adora’s acrophobia, which after about three months, was mostly defeated. Adora was shocked at how quickly the time had flown, but Perfuma truly was good at her occupation. As such, she was far from finished with Adora. After tackling the acrophobia, Perfuma and Adora went on to tackle Adora’s fear of Prime, her fear of failure, and ultimately, her saviour complex. The latter had been the most difficult, given the events that had transpired over the last few years, but slowly, Adora let herself realise that it was okay for her to put herself before other people sometimes. It was okay to be selfish. That was what had saved the universe after all.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Now, a year after the war has ended, Adora is slowly becoming completely and unapologetically herself. Catra adores it. Seeing Adora embrace herself like this is all she has wanted for this last year. Finally, Adora had found her identity outside of She-Ra and her legacy. Catra loved all of Adora, She-Ra or not, and that is why she is finally ready to make sure she can’t lose the blonde girl again.<br/>
<br/>
“Nervous?” Glimmer asks, as she watches Catra pull on a maroon shoulder garment, similar to the one the feline woman had worn after the first portal, except this time, it had two sleeves.<br/>
“Very.” Catra answers, flipping open a white ring box. Inside is a silver band, with a turquoise gemstone- part of the runestone from the original Sword of Protection.<br/>
“She loves you, Catra. All this therapy, all this trying to improve herself, it’s all been for you. Believe me when I tell you, nobody wants to spend the rest of their lives together more than you and Adora. Nobody deserves a happily ever after more than you two either.” Glimmer smiles, and opens her arms. Catra walks into them, hugging Glimmer close.<br/>
“Thank you. For everything.” Catra manages to say. Glimmer smirks.<br/>
“Don’t go soft on me, Horde Scum.”<br/>
“Not a chance, Sparkles.”<br/>
<br/>
As Catra and Glimmer leave the room, and head for the newly fitted ballroom, Catra can’t help but think to herself how much the course of her life had changed. If you’d have told her 18 months ago that after the war was over, she’d be living in Bright Moon with Glimmer, Bow and Adora, as well as an alien pet cat, she’d have thought you were crazy. But now, it’s everything she’s ever wanted, and she wouldn’t change anything that happened to get here. She and Adora were finally going to be happy.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Adora and Bow walk on the corridor above Catra and Glimmer, unaware of their respective partners walking below them. Adora is wearing a beautiful long white sleeveless sweetheart gown with a golden waistband, and heels to match. Her hair is tied half up half down, with a golden crown across her forehead. She retains her signature hair poof, which is clipped back into the clip that holds her hair in a bun at the back. The blonde keeps fidgeting with the pocket of the dress, a nervous expression on her face.<br/>
<br/>
“Adora.” Bow chimes in a chiding tone. Adora looks up at him apologetically.<br/>
“Sorry, Bow. I’m just so nervous.” She explains. Bow smiles softly.<br/>
“Hey, it’s okay. That’s a normal feeling. But you and Catra are made for each other. Your love literally saved the universe. She’s going to say yes, trust me.”<br/>
“What if I mess it up?” Adora asks worriedly.<br/>
“It doesn’t matter. What <em>does</em> matter is that you propose to Catra, and let her know that you love her. I think you can manage that.” Bow laughs. Adora smiles.<br/>
“Yeah, you’re right.” Adora says, pulling her hand from her pocket.<br/>
<br/>
Adora smiles to herself as she strolls alongside Bow. She can say that she is irretrievably in love with Catra, if it was even possible for her to be able to love her more than she had to begin with. Adora inhales, bracing herself for the moment ahead. She and Bow walk along the corridor to the ballroom, and as they arrive, Catra and Glimmer are just coming from downstairs. Adora smiles at Catra, as her girlfriend mirrors the gesture. Glimmer and Bow share a knowing look, before taking each other’s hands, and entering the ballroom. As the guard announces Glimmer and Bow’s arrival, Catra takes Adora’s hand in her own and smiles, as they follow their friends.<br/>
<br/>
“Now announcing the arrival of Princess Adora, She-Ra, Saviour of Etheria, and Her Majesty’s Royal Advisor, Catra of Bright Moon.” Adora always loved that title attached to Catra’s name. It was kind of attractive to her to be completely honest. Another pro to marrying her, Adora supposed. She was proud of how far Catra had come. Of how far they had both come, together. It was where they were always meant to be.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
As the ball winds on, Adora and Catra dance to their hearts content, each girl careful in making sure that their partner did not touch the pockets that had their ring boxes in. As a soft melody plays through the ball room, Adora excuses herself from a small group of elves from Elberon, in order to go to the balcony, and rest her feet. Catra notices her, and excuses herself from her conversation with Glimmer and Micah. It was only defence strategies, they could discuss it tomorrow. From across the room, Glimmer and Bow catch each other’s eyes, and smirk at the balcony.<br/>
<br/>
“Hey Adora.” Catra purrs, startling her girlfriend.<br/>
“C-Catra.” Adora stammers, now more nervous than ever. This was her chance.<br/>
“Whatcha doing out here?” Catra asks, noting the flustered expression on her lover’s face.<br/>
“I-um...” Adora stutters. Catra tilts her head to the side in confusion.<br/>
“Baby, are you okay?” Catra asks, frowning.<br/>
“Marry me.” Adora suddenly blurts out. Catra recoils, and Adora slams a hand over her mouth, mentally cursing herself. This was not how she meant to ask.<br/>
“I mean-“ Adora begins, but Catra interrupts her.<br/>
“Yes.” Catra states, smiling softly.<br/>
“Yes?” Adora asks. Catra laughs, and pulls Adora close to her, pressing their lips together.<br/>
<br/>
And suddenly, it’s like Adora’s free falling, this feeling of pure love absorbing her completely, as Adora loses herself in the sensation of Catra’s lips. Her partner’s warm hands hold onto her waist as if it was the most delicate thing in the world, as Adora’s hands roam Catra’s face, pressing gently into the tan skin. Everything in the world stops, and for a moment, it is just she and Catra. Adora melts into this blissful feeling. This is what perfection feels like. This is what falling feels like. And suddenly, falling from the heights no longer scared Adora.<br/>
<br/>
Catra slides her hands down slightly, and her right hand hits a square shaped object in Adora’s pocket. She breaks the kiss softly, leaving a whining Adora. Catra looks down at Adora’s pocket, as the blonde sheepishly smiles, pulling out the red velvet box. Catra smiles to herself, and digs in her own trouser pocket, pulling out a white ring box. Adora gasps in surprise, as Catra smirks.<br/>
“You were going to-“ Adors trails off, shocked.<br/>
“Yes, I was, dummy. But you beat me to it.” Catra smiles, as she gets down on one knee. Adora begins to cry, tears falling down her face before she can even comprehend them. Catra opens the ring box, and takes Adora’s hand in her own. She slips on the silver band, watching as Adora admires the ring as if it’s the most beautiful thing in the world.<br/>
“We made a promise, a long time ago, that we’d look out for each other. And for a long time, I failed that promise. But now, Adora, I am going to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I love you, so so much. I always have, and I always will.” Catra asserts, as Adora continues to cry.<br/>
<br/>
Adora opens the red ring box to reveal an intricately designed golden band, with a diamond at the centre. Mirroring her significant other’s actions, she places the ring on Catra’s left fourth finger. Catra can’t help but cry now, overwhelmed at the love she feels for her lover, her fiancé, her soon-to-be wife.<br/>
“Seven months ago, you asked me to fall for you instead of fearing falling from the heights. And now, I don’t fear the heights any longer. Because of you. You saved me. You saved Etheria. And for so long, we were torn apart. Now, Catra, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Every day, every night. I want to wake up at sunrise and see you sleeping next to me. I want to do everything with you Catra. Try every food, travel everywhere there is to go. I want to tell our love story to our child, or children, or whatever we end up with. Because I am in love with you, always.” Adora swears. Catra hiccups as she tries to hold back her tears. Looking down at her engagement ring, she smiles, before pulling Adora in for another deep kiss. Finally, after so long, everything is perfect.</p>
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